President Bush (even after this time is STILL sounds wrong) is raising support for

his Invasion of Iraq by telephoning members of Congress.

This is my version of what his script might look like...

Dear Senator (use senator’s last name here).

This is President George Bush speaking.

I am calling to ask your support for the (use your scary voice) War on Terrorism.

As you know, Saddam Hussein has Weapons of Mass Destruction (use your scary voice again) and he plans on using them.

pause and take a deep breath

We must defend ourselves from this menace and the best way to do that is to invade his country.

if the Senator points out that we went to war against Iraq when he invaded Kuwait say:

But he has Weapons of Mass Destruction.

if the Senator points out that this seems to be protecting Big Oil’s interests say:

So, Senator, are you Un-American?

add quickly

You know, I can easily have Trent Lott visit your house.

if the Senator points out that the invasion seems to be a distraction so that the news stops covering:

the increase of corporate greed

your lack of qualifications to hold office

the fact that you want to open up forests for clear-cutting as a way to control fires

the fact that there has never been a vice president so blatantly calling the shots

your own stock fraud investigation

your lack of any real military experience

your administration’s policies being dictated by corporations

HANG UP!

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